life: acoustic & amplified

poetry, quotes & thoughts about life

Archive for the category “Tears”

13 Apr 2012
1 Comment

Into the silence

I am still
I wait
I pray
I clean
I am alone
– for the most part
Solitary
– even in a crowd

I wish for it
– interruptions come
some enjoyable
some annoying
I am present, yet not

I know the answer will come
I know movement is coming
but for now
It is the silence
That I embrace
and endure
with patience
and courage
at other times I have even been cheerful during this time
but not this time

This time,
I am in mourning
Grief surrounds my heart
heavy sadness
– for choices made
– being made even now

I long for intimacy
I long to be the choice
I wish I could help
but I can’t

Only God can do what needs to be done
– and He can only do it if the choice is made by you
– to ask, seek, knock – even the slightest opening He can transform
the choice is personal and must be freely made

and so we wait –
me and God
Jesus puts his arm around my shoulders
and pulls me close
I feel the Spirit holding my heart and bringing me comfort
I close my eyes and hear his promise,
‘I will never leave you or forsake you’
and my sadness is blurred
with the surge of peace and joy

The silence is good
we know each other here
in the waiting
we have been here many times before
I have learned to wait
– Even enjoy this path
the answer will come soon enough
this is the place of intimacy and trust
where we know each other most

Life will move forward
and I will spring into action
and do what is being set for me to do in my waiting

I do not question the way
– I am a willing vessel
Mine was a shattered life
which has known your healing touch
you, so lovingly, put my pieces together again
and mended me with love

My God knows the way
– mine is a heart of thankfulness
I am the grateful follower
waiting to love you and share with whomever I can
Not for any other reason except love

You have allowed me to glimpse
My belovedness
My value
The value of each soul you have created
The depths of your love is unending

I desire only to please you
My creator, my savior, my lover, my friend

I long to share this love
with the ones you allow me to

And so I wait
I stay in the silence
until my answer comes
and God speaks
I am listening, Lord
As You have before,
Speak when you are ready

AL 4/13/12

Posted in Alone, Becoming Yourself, Beginning, Beliefs, Blessing, Career, Change, Choice, commitment, courage, determination, do, Encouragement, Faith, find art at pinterest, Freedom, Gratitude, Grieving, Growth, Habits, Happiness, healing, inspiration, Joy, Letting Go, Life, Lonely, Losing, Love, Miracles, Passion, Patience, Peace, People, Poetry, Prayer, Purpose, quiet, Reality, Reflection, Relationships, Respect, Solitude, strength, success, Tears, Tenderness, thankfulness, Thoughts, time, Today, Trust, truth, Uncategorized, Vulnerability, worry
08 Apr 2012

Happy Easter!!!

20120408-093514.jpg

Love crucified arose! Wooo hoooo!

Posted in Becoming Yourself, Beginning, Beliefs, Blessing, Change, Choice, confidence, courage, Death, determination, do, Encouragement, Faith, find art at pinterest, Freedom, Gratitude, Growth, Happiness, Happy Holiday!, Hope, inspiration, Joy, Life, Love, Miracles, Passion, People, Prayer, Reality, Relationships, Spring, Tears, Tenderness, thankfulness, Thoughts, time, Today, Trust, truth, Vulnerability, Winning, words | Leave a comment
05 Mar 2012

ask, seek, knock

Almost 22 years ago I asked God! I had no idea if God was real at that point. I sure didn’t see God in any of the people around me. Religion sure had no answers, and so I started on the path with a very heavy scepticism. I really had no idea of anything. I truly emptied myself, of all I had been taught all my life, and worked to challenge my thought process. I challenged and thought about everything that came into my life.

I determined only to follow what brought me peace and led me towards happiness. I knew I would make mistakes – because I had no idea what I was doing, but I determinied I would do my best to face what I did and not make those same mistakes again! I determined to take personal responsibility for my life and my actions and I started off  on my experiment to find life. I was challenged to TRY to live as close to the principles I found in the words of Jesus in Matthew 5-7, The Sermon on the Mount.

It is interesting to me that over those years, when I struggled through this challenge that is humanly impossible, I struggled to feel the humanness of Jesus. I really had no idea if what I was doing was doing anything but leading me into brokenness and pain. I had to hold onto two things. The promises and hope of God, and the fact that I felt the personal, gut peace which no one else had access to. There was something bigger than what I could possible do happening! I was witnessing and aware of this. It was growing and so was my belief – no one could take away what I had seen, felt, tasted, experienced. Those miracles that came to me are more than evidence – they are my life-blood!

I now know Jesus intimately – after all I have been trying my best to live his words for the past 22 years! I KNOW HIM! I know his beautiful heart. I have lived his truth – it is my truth! LOVE!!! FREEDOM!!! RESPECT!!!! SERVE!!!

Yesterday I heard a sermon on Jesus as the Bread of life. As the crowd rejected ‘eating his flesh’ (knowing him intimately) his disciples were left alone with him. He asked them if they would leave also and Peter said, “Where would we go? You have the words of eternal life”. Yes, I echo that today. I have no where else to go – my experiment has turned out to be so much more than I ever expected. I am in love with Jesus! and it makes me glad!

I still know very little as far as the mysteries of God – I am so glad that I am not arrogant enough to think I can figure out the creator of this amazing world! I don’t worry about a lot – I am too busy falling in love, knowing the heart of love, figuring out how I can share that love with others who need it so badly!!!

Posted in Adventure, Becoming Yourself, Beginning, Beliefs, Blessing, Change, Choice, confidence, courage, determination, do, Dreams, Encouragement, Faith, find art at pinterest, Freedom, Gratitude, Habits, Happiness, Hope, Imagine, Impossible, Joy, kindness, laugh, Letting Go, Life, light, Love, Miracles, Peace, People, Purpose, Reflection, Relationships, Respect, success, Tears, Tenderness, thankfulness, Thoughts, time, Today, Trust, Vulnerability | Leave a comment
25 Feb 2012

face the truth

Where the Wild Things Are

Go with him
into the deserted places
where mind won’t survive,

deep in your wilds, exposed,
with the beasts,
feral, shifty, wise

in their wordless ways,
their primal hungers,
their devouring instincts,

disappearing easily
into your canyons and outcroppings.
You don’t vanquish them,

you watch,
and learn to survive among them,
and witness the mystery,

how they lie down beside him.
Even they know
these washes and gulches

are a palm.
In this extremity,
you find your place

among your terrors,
your wastelands,
your angels.

__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
www.unfoldinglight.net

Posted in Adventure, America, art, beauty, Becoming Yourself, Beginning, Beliefs, Blessing, Blog, Change, Choice, courage, create, Dancing, Death, determination, do, Dreams, Encouragement, Faith, find art at pinterest, Freedom, fun, Gratitude, Grieving, Growth, Habits, Happiness, home, Hope, Imagine, Joy, Life, light, Love, Miracles, People, Poetry, Prayer, Reality, Reflection, Relationships, Solitude, strength, Tears, Tenderness, thankfulness, Thoughts, time, Today, Trust, Vulnerability | Leave a comment
23 Feb 2012

Can you feel the music?

A lot of the daily messages I get right now are about Lent. I didn’t grow up with Lent and so I find it somewhat exotic. Over the past several years I have observed the practice and have found it so beautiful and beneficial. It is an important event, and it is a time to go deep into some tough issues. The messages I get in my daily inspirational doses are great (for the most part) and present Lent as both difficult, but joyous! Which I believe is true. We must begin to be vulnerable to our brokenness, if we want to feel our deepest joy!

It is interesting to me the contrast of when I hear people talking about Lent in everyday conversation. Like at my job, or in a restaurant. It seems a lot of people feel like Lent is about deprivation and punishment. I over hear them dreading ‘giving up’ chocolate, beer or meat and wondering if it will interfere with their entertainment schedule, or if is just too hard. Most of them seem to be dreading it. When I can, I try to insert myself into their  conversation (I hope they appreciate it at some point! ha) and assure them that is not what Lent is about – we are not called to punishment! We are called to a deeper experience of life. We are called to freedom, love and joy! Life is beautiful  – that is the message!

I try to encourage the people who feel this way to turn it around this year. Don’t be punished by ‘giving up’ use the 40 days to ADD something special. Write a 40 day journal and concentrate on looking for one good thing a day to be thankful and write about!

Lent is about reflection about deepening our lives in every way. Let’s try to get the message out that Jesus never wanted religion – his beautiful life and death was because of love to give us truth and freedom. He wants our love, relationship, communion, fellowship, passion. Yes, it’s all about love.

 

Posted in Adventure, Alone, art, beauty, Becoming Yourself, Beginning, Beliefs, Blessing, Career, Change, Choice, courage, create, Dancing, Death, determination, do, Dreams, Encouragement, Faith, find art at pinterest, Freedom, fun, Gratitude, Grieving, Growth, Habits, Happiness, home, Hope, Imagine, Impossible, Joy, kindness, laugh, Letting Go, Life, light, Lonely, Love, Miracles, music, Party, Passion, Patience, Peace, People, power, Prayer, Proof, Purpose, quiet, Quotes, Reality, Reflection, Relationships, Respect, Smile, Solitude, strength, success, Sweet, Tears, Tenderness, thankfulness, Thoughts, time, Today, Trust, Vulnerability, words | Leave a comment
22 Feb 2012

how to live a happy, peaceful life:

wow!
it’s always my choice!

Posted in Adventure, Alone, beauty, Becoming Yourself, Beginning, Beliefs, Blessing, Career, Change, Choice, courage, create, Dancing, do, Dreams, Encouragement, Faith, find art at pinterest, force, Freedom, fun, Gratitude, Growth, Habits, Happiness, home, Hope, Imagine, Impossible, Joy, kindness, laugh, Leadership, Letting Go, Life, light, Love, Miracles, Passion, Patience, Peace, People, power, Prayer, Quotes, Reality, Reflection, Relationships, Smile, strength, success, Tears, Tenderness, Thoughts, time, Today, Trust, Vulnerability, Winning, worry | Leave a comment
19 Feb 2012

If you want it – it’s all there for us!

We just have to choose who we want to be and then keep making choices toward those amazing things!!!! I love that!

Posted in Adventure, art, beauty, Becoming Yourself, Beginning, Beliefs, Blessing, Change, Choice, courage, create, Dancing, determination, do, Dreams, Encouragement, Faith, find art at pinterest, Freedom, fun, Gratitude, Growth, Habits, Happiness, home, Hope, Imagine, Impossible, Joy, kindness, laugh, Letting Go, Life, light, Love, Miracles, music, Passion, Patience, Peace, People, Prayer, Proof, Purpose, Reality, Reflection, Relationships, Respect, Smile, strength, success, Sweet, Tears, Tenderness, thankfulness, Thoughts, time, Today, Trust, Vulnerability | Leave a comment
16 Feb 2012

love sets free

Free will, though it makes evil possible, is also the only thing that makes possible any love or goodness or joy worth having. – C.S. Lewis
Today is a ‘Freedom Anniversary’ for me! It is a big deal! My life has been a progression of stepping towards freedom.
The battles have been long, dangerous and hard to win in order to free myself. Both physically and spiritually. I am not completely there yet – it is a life-long exploration and journey to free myself. The chains and bars in my prisons, because I find they are legion, are very strong. My Alcatraz type barren -rock islands were such a long way from shore, with many snipers, predators and sharp rocks in the water and on all sides of the shores. My guards were very alert and ready to shoot me, or keep me locked down and in solitary for my whole life. They were gleeful when I fell and happy over my pain and destruction.
And yet, the love, the words, and truth, of God were so much more powerful than any of these things, that no prison in this world could not hold me and, for 22 years now, I keep walking out of my prisons into the brilliant light and sunshine of the free!!!!

I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings
Maya Angelou

A free bird leaps on the back
Of the wind and floats downstream
Till the current ends and dips his wing
In the orange suns rays
And dares to claim the sky.

But a bird that stalks down his narrow cage|
Can seldom see through his bars of rage
His wings are clipped and his feet are tied
So he opens his throat to sing.

The caged bird sings with a fearful trill
Of things unknown but longed for still
And his tune is heard on the distant hill for
The caged bird sings of freedom.

The free bird thinks of another breeze
And the trade winds soft through
The sighing trees
And the fat worms waiting on a dawn-bright
Lawn and he names the sky his own.

But a caged bird stands on the grave of dreams
His shadow shouts on a nightmare scream
His wings are clipped and his feet are tied
So he opens his throat to sing.

The caged bird sings with
A fearful trill of things unknown
But longed for still and his
Tune is heard on the distant hill
For the caged bird sings of freedom.

http://songsfromthevalley.com/July-09-2-14-Freedom.pdf

Posted in Adventure, Alone, America, art, beauty, Becoming Yourself, Beginning, Beliefs, Blessing, Blog, Burnign Bridges, Career, Change, Choice, courage, create, Dancing, Death, determination, do, dominance, Dreams, Encouragement, force, Freedom, fun, Gratitude, Grieving, Growth, Habits, Happiness, Happy Holiday!, home, Hope, Imagine, Impossible, Joy, Judging, kindness, laugh, Leadership, Letting Go, Life, light, Lonely, Losing, Love, Miracles, Mother, music, Newsletter, Party, Passion, Peace, People, Poetry, politics, power, Prayer, Proof, Purpose, quiet, Quotes, Reality, Reflection, Relationships, Respect, Seasons, Smile, Solitude, Songs from the Valley, Spring, Stars and Moonlight, strength, success, Sweet, Tears, Tenderness, thankfulness, Thoughts, time, Today, Trust, Uncategorized, Vulnerability, Winning, words, worry, Writing | Leave a comment
15 Feb 2012

Words That Feed Us

When we talk to one another, we often talk about what happened, what we are doing, or what we plan to do. Often we say, “What’s up?” and we encourage one another to share the details of our daily lives. But often we want to hear something else. We want to hear, “I’ve been thinking of you today,” or “I missed you,” or “I wish you were here,” or “I really love you.” It is not always easy to say these words, but such words can deepen our bonds with one another.
Telling someone “I love you” in whatever way is always delivering good news. Nobody will respond by saying, “Well, I knew that already, you don’t have to say it again”! Words of love and affirmation are like bread. We need them each day, over and over. They keep us alive inside.
Posted in Adventure, Alone, beauty, Becoming Yourself, Beginning, Beliefs, Blessing, Blog, Change, Choice, courage, create, Dancing, determination, do, Dreams, Encouragement, Freedom, fun, Gratitude, Growth, Habits, Happiness, home, Hope, Imagine, Impossible, Joy, kindness, laugh, Letting Go, Life, light, Lonely, Love, Miracles, Mother, music, Passion, People, power, Prayer, Proof, Purpose, Quotes, Reality, Reflection, Relationships, Respect, Smile, Solitude, strength, success, Sweet, Tears, Tenderness, thankfulness, Thoughts, time, Today, Trust, Vulnerability, Winning, words | Leave a comment
14 Feb 2012

Knowing your heart

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Did I really think that on Valentine’s Day, or any day, i would be satisfied with a silly post? Ha
The Alchemist is one of my very favorite books. So glad Paulo Coelho posted this today!!!

“Why do we have to listen to our hearts?” the boy asked, when they had made camp that day.

“Because, wherever your heart is, that is where you’ll find your treasure.”

“But my heart is agitated,” the boy said. “It has its dreams, it gets emotional, and it’s become passionate over a woman of the desert. It asks things of me, and it keeps me from sleeping many nights, when I’m thinking about her.”

“Well, that’s good. Your heart is alive. Keep listening to what it has to say.”

“My heart is a traitor,” the boy said to the alchemist, when they had paused to rest the horses. “It doesn’t want me to go on.”

“That makes sense. Naturally it’s afraid that, in pursuing your dream, you might lose everything you’ve on.”

“Well, then, why should I listen to my heart?”

“Because you will never again be able to keep it quiet. ”

“You mean I should listen, even if it’s treasonous?”

“Treason is a blow that comes unexpectedly. If you know your heart well, it will never be able to do that to you. Because you’ll know its dreams and wishes, and will know how to deal with them.

“My heart is afraid that it will have to suffer,” the boy told the alchemist one night as they looked up at the moonless sky.

“Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second’s encounter with God and with eternity.”

Paulo Coelho From “The Alchemist”

http://paulocoelhoblog.com/2012/02/14/our-hear/

Posted in Adventure, art, beauty, Becoming Yourself, Beginning, Beliefs, Blessing, Blog, Change, Choice, courage, create, Dancing, determination, do, Dreams, Encouragement, Freedom, fun, Gratitude, Growth, Habits, Happiness, Happy Holiday!, home, Hope, Imagine, Joy, kindness, laugh, Letting Go, Life, Love, Miracles, Passion, People, Prayer, Quotes, Reality, Reflection, Relationships, Respect, strength, success, Sweet, Tears, Tenderness, thankfulness, Thoughts, time, Today, Trust, Vulnerability, words, Writing | Leave a comment

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