relaxing in the mysterious
Silence
Into the deepest darkness
Into the belly of hell
Within the circle of silence
far inside my soul
Places I’ve never seen before
Didn’t know existed
The mystery of the Spirit
Where death resides
Fearful places
Cracking open
So secret I want to flee
Afraid of this place
Am I here alone?
am I still breathing?
Now I cry with Christ,
‘My God, my God,
Why have You forsaken me?’
What if I can’t escape?
What if death wins?
I know how weak I am without You
I cannot see
As I lay beaten
finished
I get the revelation
The victory is already Yours
You were there
You are always there
The stone is slowly rolling
hopes rise
darkness trembles
death slinks around the corner
I am at the tomb door
of my own borrowed tomb
wisdom I was so sure of
yesterday
now bound tightly
discarded on the pile
to be burned
creating space
for this unnamable mystery
shaken by this devastating grace
slowly I try to stand
the pain shoots sharply
from my hip in both directions
I limp ahead
favoring the right side
I am forever changed
AL 12/23/12
the light in my hands
If I cup my hands and try to hold perfect darkness in there, it takes great effort and care. With the slightest wiggle I am apt to create some tiny crack somewhere, where the light gets in. I strain and contort my hands. I can’t actually see if the darkness is complete, if there is a little spot of light between any two fingers, so I am constantly looking, doubtful, checking, anxious, uncertain, tense.
Or I can relax and let the light in.
I can try to hold my soul just so, so that no sin enters, and feel anxious that it may happen, and awful when it does. Or I can relax and let the light in. I can trust that, yes, there are shadows, and yet light is there.
In prayer I can try to hold other things out. Or I can relax and let the light in.
That’s how we all get to heaven. God just relaxes and lets the light in.
____________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
http://www.unfoldinglight.net
life: acoustic & amplified 