life: acoustic & amplified
poetry, quotes & thoughts about life
Archive for the category “Becoming Yourself”
afterburner
Ask yourself
As you stand there
In the pale grey air
Frozen to these four walls
Feet turned to stone
Decide!
What is worth saving?
Can you will your hands
To grab the memories
You carry only in your heart
Can you pack your boxes full
With the laughter that rings in your ears
The clouds taunt you
Hurry!
There is no time left
Three red flags declare your fate
The defiance of your feet
The moan caught in your throat
Your hands still empty
🔥
This Does Not Belong To You by Salyna Gracie
http://womenspiritualpoetry.blogspot.com/2014/10/this-does-not-belong-to-you-by-salyna.html?m=1
At any given moment
we get to decide what we keep
and what we leave behind
what truly matters
what creates value for us
As my friend, Barbara McAfee, says,
“Who ya gonna be while you’re passing through?”
No one can answer that question for anyone else,
though many times we allow them to do so.
Sometimes it’s a radical loss
we have lost everything we have kept dear
all our treasures in this world
in fire, flood, loss of jobs, health,
bloody battles with power hungry ex’s,
even flukey things never expected.
These are our opportunities
when we only have ourselves left
and we burn as we adjust to this new space of being
the grieving takes us into different,
often difficult, spaces
where we get to (ok, have to) do a new thing
this is where life can reveal our best,
or worst,
because, it’s always our choice!
My wish for us is that
this becomes a beautiful foundation
to rebuild our new ships –
the latest and greatest in technological wonders –
the kind which will catch the best wind
to take us to the next adventure
for which we set sail!
Where our very lives become
our grandest home ever!
The best is always yet to be!
⛵️
Amy Lloyd (AL)
aka The Oracle of Hope & Happiness
When there has been too much pain, we often forget that we have the built-in capacity to move through it to another state. The Divine gave us tears to be cried, the capacity to express our anger, a vast range of emotional devices that, when healthily unleashed and expressed, can clear the toxicity out of us, and lead us to lessons of self-love at the heart of them. In our authentic vulnerability lies our greatest power—the power to re open our hearts after loss and disappointment. The idea that feeling the pain gives power to those who have hurt us is completely wrong. Feeling the pain is an act of self-empowerment and the only way to make a break from the prison of repressed emotions. Reach inside and unlock the door…
– Jeff Brown
chances are something you give yourself. – The Universe (TUT)
It was a long time ago.
I have almost forgotten my dream.
But it was there then,
In front of me,
Bright like a sun-
My dream.
And then the wall rose,
Rose slowly,
Slowly,
Between me and my dream.
Rose until it touched the sky-
The wall.
Shadow.
I am black.
I lie down in the shadow.
No longer the light of my dream before me,
Above me.
Only the thick wall.
Only the shadow.
My hands!
My dark hands!
Break through the wall!
Find my dream!
Help me to shatter this darkness,
To smash this night,
To break this shadow
Into a thousand lights of sun,
Into a thousand whirling dreams
Of sun!
—
As I Grew Older by Langston Hughes
It’s a story as old as time itself
Girl meets boy
There they go
Falling in love
It’s an ending no tale wants to tell
Girl and boy
Drifting farther
And farther apart
Now she lives in the house of broken dreams
pictures fade
Time stands still
All the shadows standing in their places
Cracks appear
Clock feebly striking on through the gloom
As the tears fall down her face
It’s all just the way it all was then
Just the same as the day when life broke
30 years ago
although lots of things have gathered
into every available surface and corner
Dust falls down
Settling on fading glitter
Grime on glass
Fogging up the window panes
mold grows free
covering years of freeform piles
She still smiles that painted smile
You can’t see the lonely spaces
when you meet her on the street
Life moves on and on without her
It’s illusion that you see
Because she lives in the house of broken dreams
pictures fade
Time stands still
All the shadows standing in their places
Cracks appear
Clock strikes weakly at each hour
As the tears fall down her face
It’s the ending no reader wants to read
Girl and boy
Drifting farther
And farther apart
until he leaves
and she fights
to get something she can keep forever
as she always dreamed it would be
Never letting go
Never moving on
It’s the hardest part
Nobody wants to read this ending
This extreme dirty secret behind estate gates
stone lions eternally guarding
heartbreak frozen in time
hoarding only she can stop
💨
Amy Lloyd (AL)
If you have a dream, don’t just sit there. Gather courage to believe that you can succeed and leave no stone unturned to make it a reality.
– Roopleen
“I have a firm belief in this now, not only in terms of my own experience, but in knowing the experiences of other people. When you follow your bliss, and by bliss I mean the deep sense of being in it, and doing what the push is out of your own existence—it may not be fun, but it’s your bliss and there’s bliss behind pain too.
“You follow that and doors will open where there were no doors before, where you would not have thought there’d be doors, and where there wouldn’t be a door for anybody else.
“. . . And so I think the best thing I can say is to follow your bliss. If your bliss is just your fun and your excitement, you’re on the wrong track. I mean, you need instruction. Know where your bliss is. And that involves coming down to a deep place in yourself.”
Joseph Campbell, “The Hero’s Journey”
preserving by excusing
The true inner self
must be drawn up
like a jewel from
the bottom of the sea,
rescued from confusion,
from indistinction,
from immersion
in the common,
the nondescript,
the trivial,
the sordid,
the evanescent.
-Thomas Merton
Seed of Contemplation
words silently spoken
from the other room
words fitly
uttered aloud
in due time
silent revelry
of the heart
surrendered
to defeat
successful in distraction
sidetracked by our addictions of choice
too brilliant to be truly seen
waiting to die
too damaged to brave transparency
too convinced that ‘nothing can be done’ to brave self responsibility
too comfortable to say no to that monster keeping us chained to the weakest parts of ourselves
the bullsh** of wasted lives
the emptiness of wasting time
the cruel decisions of men drowning
the hopes of the weak trampled
the tragedy of the parental misguidance
ingrained foundations
the travesty of religion
gone wrong
it happens so often
doctrine and old false belief systems
becoming the
masters of deceit filled lives
rather than the servant
of love
oh soul arise and fight
break up the hallowed ground of the falsified truth
oh, my friend, take back your life
open the beautiful box
of your most vulnerable, passionate essence
the pope will never take your case
your parents will never grant permission
but then again,
why would you want them too?
This is your life!
Only you can stand for what is given you
take that buried coffin
out of the ground
plant a seed or two inside
No one else can do it for you
or take it away from you
just you
you can never be too sensitive
you already know the real truth
celebrate yourself
flaunt your true colors
they’re so very beautiful
remember to remember
only love is real
💞
Amy Lloyd (AL)
Help Me
As they’re used psychologically, words like repression, denial, sublimation, and defense all refer to one form or another of the way human beings erect walls to hide behind, both from each other and from themselves. You repress the memory that is too painful to deal with, say. You deny your weight problem. You sublimate some of your sexual energy by channeling it into other forms of activity more socially acceptable. You conceal your sense of inadequacy behind a defensive bravado. And so on and so forth. The inner state you end up with is a castle-like affair of keep, inner wall, outer wall, and moat, which you erect originally to be a fortress to keep the enemy out, but which turns into a prison where you become the jailer and thus your own enemy. It is a wretched and lonely place. You can’t be what you want to be there or do what you want to do. People can’t see through all that masonry to who you truly are, and half the time you’re not sure you can see who you truly are yourself, you’ve been walled up so long.
Fortunately there are two words that offer a way out, and they’re simply these: “Help me.” It’s not always easy to say them-you have your pride after all, and you’re not sure there’s anybody you trust enough to say them to-but they’re always worth saying. To another human being-a friend, a stranger? To God? Maybe it comes to the same thing.
Help me. They open a door through the walls, that’s all. At least hope is possible again. At least you’re no longer alone.
~ Frederick Buechner
originally published in Whistling in the Dark and later in Beyond Words
the dr is in
Living systems never really settle down.
– John Holland
We were only to sleep for a short while.
Words stuck in thick layers , they are there and then they are gone …and the fire burns day and night…like some drift wood set a blaze on a lonely hill.
Not many know the fire…not many know the Way…
but that fire keeps setting the sun to blaze; Spirit beats within the body and pages are blank…
It is everything, and it is nothing.
Spirit empties one to naked longing, then traps the soul in a loving embrace.
Vowed to live it’s days on earth, as it is in heaven…
Soul , human body with mystery and mayhem…
With preoccupation with the Holy; with adoration won…with words that ache to be heard but have no expression in this realm…
Veil once torn…eye filled with Light…
Worlds riding within worlds…glances, witness, wonders.
The madness that comes, when you know God,
Come back on a black horse, for the fire will chase all the others away.
Ride like the wind, knowing nothing at all….and living the Fire.
Beauty,
Donna Knutson
Above the ground after a brief silence
they resume their war
before they are even out of the graveyard,
climbing over each other
trying to save their own lives,
clawing at some unseen soil above them,
while beneath he rests in peace,
where, after all, we each long to be,
borne to our resting ground,
cherished and at peace,
soon and very soon.
Could I slip beneath the grass
of my battlefields and travel there?
Can I find a way to live
without that combat,
rest without that death,
to grant to the wicked
the eternal peace of the living?
God, bury me
beneath the feet of my anxieties.
Let them go on without me, arguing.
Let me be a ghost of grace,
untroubled, unbound,
interred in love.
__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
all day long
the music inside me
walks me through
every day the song-lists play
weaving themselves into the world
around my going
just yesterday
you created new symphonic occurrences
to be forever included
in my smile
my senses refined by the touch of you
the wind gently touching my face
with delicate fingers
my sweat soaked body
reminds me of that deep burning fire
life plays on and on
with me for this very moment
right here
right now
part of the harmony
a single black, dotted note
creating my little piece
of the grand composition
the masterpiece would be completely different
without me
without you
🎶
Amy Lloyd (AL)
One of the greatest mistakes we make in this life, I think, is losing hope when we don’t get what we want RIGHT AWAY. It takes time to do anything that matters—to change, to learn to love, to build a business or grow a child or grow into ourselves.
—
Sadly, too many of us (myself included) lose heart when we don’t see results RIGHT THIS MINUTE.
—
And when we lose hope, we lose everything.
—
Hope is not this fluffy thing we sometimes think it is. Hope is dangerous. It’s radical. When we hope, we take a tremendous risk, waiting and waking our hearts to something that we know full well may never come to fruition. There are no guarantees in this life. We do not have 100% control.
—
Hope hurts. If it doesn’t hurt, it isn’t hope.
—
And yet I am learning what it means to take LONG view. As I look back over the past 33 years of my life, I realize most of the things I have hoped for have taken DECADES to grow into themselves. It takes a LONG, LONG TIME for things to make sense.
—
Hope trusts the process—that even if we don’t get the thing we want right away, the story is not over. It’s not completely written.
—
Hope is steadfast and unwavering. It keeps going and gong and going.
—
Whatever you’re waiting for, hoping for, wishing for, don’t give up. Keep hoping. Most things don’t make sense until later. Hope is your lifeline. It is your only way home.
🏡
Allison Fallon
where’ve you been?
The rising moon has hid the stars;
Her level rays,
like golden bars,
Lie on the landscape green,
With shadows brown between.
And silver white the river gleams,
As if Diana, in her dreams,
Had dropt her silver bow
Upon the meadows low.
On such a tranquil night as this,
She woke Endymion with a kiss,
When, sleeping in the grove,
He dreamed not of her love.
Like Dian’s kiss,
unasked, unsought,
Love gives itself, but is not bought;
Her voice, nor sound betrays
Its deep, impassioned gaze.
It comes,
—the beautiful, the free,
The crown of all humanity,—
In silence and alone
To seek the elected one.
It lifts the boughs,
whose shadows deep,
Are Life’s oblivion, the soul’s sleep,
And kisses the closed eyes
Of him, who slumbering lies.
O, weary hearts! O, slumbering eyes!
O, drooping souls, whose destinies
Are fraught with fear and pain,
Ye shall be loved again!
No one is so accursed by fate,
No one so utterly desolate,
But some heart, though unknown,
Responds unto his own.
Responds,
—as if with unseen wings,
A breath from heaven had touched its strings
And whispers, in its song,
“Where hast though stayed so long!”
😍
– Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
I’ll always want to drive with you.
I’ll always want to trace
all the corners of the world
with my own bare hands.
We’ll whirl by the exits like flight.
Like wind.
Two birds collecting stories.
Breaking all cages.
Chasing our whims.
Maybe we could leave tonight
without falling far behind
we’ll shed our pain and armor
and be in this music,
these dreams,
these roads.
Yours and mine.
We’ll find the center
of everything
and we will ride.
We’ll just drive.
🚘
by Victoria Erickson, Writer
today’s weather
Todays weather calls for
Sunny outlook
with occasional clouds floating through
a few showers always possible
through out the day
daisies sure to peek out of the green grass
just to smile for me
wine and laughter at sunset
moon tonight
full of you
with a sweet dream or two
and more than a few songs
sure to drift through me
continuing on
into my sleeping hours
Waking to a great new day of promise tomorrow
🔁
Amy Lloyd (AL)
tons and tons of sparkles
Did you know that whenever you feel love, you literally begin to glow? You probably did.
But did you know that the glowing is actually made up of zillions of minute sparkles? And that these sparkles receive as much energy as they create? And that because of this energy exchange you completely stop aging and look younger? Abundance is immediately drawn to you? Healing powers fill you? Muscles are strengthened, pounds are shed, and your vision improves? Lingering questions are answered? New friends are summoned? Old friends are poked? Problems are solved? And maple syrup tastes more maple-y?
All when you feel love.
It’s true,
The Universe
Ms. Nature is moody one
the sky is varying shades
of pale baby blue
the water is like a silver mirror
endless beautiful
the same rocks that glittered
like a million diamonds
just yesterday
are silent today
big dependable rocks
ready for Monday work week
still the same
still awesome
still beautiful
just in a different mood
today the brilliant emerald moss
on those huge rocks suspended
in the metallic mercury
glow against the silver
I think of Ireland
my draw to visit
the Emerald Isle
on the other side of this pond
life is different
yet the same
the oyster boat trolls
a heron waits until
just the right moment
then takes off
flying so close to the water
on and on
until I lose him in the horizon
I feel like him
waiting for my moment
resting for the next phase of flight
and in the fullness of time
at just the right nudge
I will take that breath and
fly
staying close to the water
my source of life
as the epic journey home
continues
My heart knows for sure
my love story has
a very happy ending
💚
Amy Lloyd (AL)
Holy One, Divine Lover,
I am your image.
Your glory, your love,
your life, your grace
is folded up in me
a thousand times
and this, my life,
is your unfolding
like a rose.
Each day your beauty emerges,
each moment your light unfolds
in me.
I honor this mystery. I trust it.
I give thanks,
that even in ugly places
you unfold your beauty in me,
each breath one of the infinite
petals of God.
In the rose garden of God
I marvel at the variety.
I walk with gentle wonder.
I give thanks
that in each of us
you give yourself
to all of us.
__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
http://www.onbeing.org/blog/david-whyte-the-house-of-belonging/8886
I cannot tell you anything that you are not already capable of knowing yourself.
Nor can I give you anything that is not already at your fingertips.
You have all the answers within your own Being to all of the questions you or anyone else may ask.
Each of us has enormous capacity of Being.
So what is it that we want or need from each other?
Value; We have the capacity to value ourselves and in doing so we set our own value.
Companionship; We experience companionship with others to the capacity that we have companionship with ourselves.
How can I understand others, if I don’t understand myself?
You reflect to me what is already within my own awareness whether I am awake to it or not.
What most of us are looking for outside of ourselves is a reflection, a mirror of what lies within us so that we can gaze upon ourselves.
As I gaze upon myself in the reflection of you
I see the beauty that hides within me
In your grief I touch on the grief I hide inside
In your laughter, laughter is ignited within me
Your Joy radiates and pierces the Joy laden in me
So that we can be in Joy
Your Spirit Unites with Mine as we gaze at Beauty emanated by a flower
This must mean that Beauty enables us to see our harmony
A harmony so perfect that nothing can escape it
As I connect to the world outside of myself it reflects me to you and you to me
We are in concert with the great symphony of the Cosmos
Infinitely expressing itself
In those special tender moments when I touch something in me gazing at you
I can hear the masterpiece sweeping us away
I can see the Vision drawing us near
I can smell the fragrance of our essence
For You Are a Part of Me and I am a Part of You
Endless Reflections of the One in Us
🎭
Reflections of Me
© 2014 Mechel Gallaway All rights Reserved
the wild & salty now
Welcome and entertain them all
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
🏡
Parker J. Palmer with a light-hearted metaphor from Rumi — on the unexpected visitor and welcoming her in, serendipitous chaos and all.
I paddled a small boat
through wind and waves in the open sea,
the wind wanting to wipe me sideways,
waves lurching me about,
the constant pressing, the effort,
the all aloneness of it,
a little dot in an ocean wide of green,
the struggle so welcome, so satisfying,
because I was there.
I have climbed mountains and hiked deserts,
raised children and journeyed through a marriage
simply to be there.
You have swung the hammer, sewed the seams,
taken the bus, changed the diapers,
recovered from the illness, done the time.
You run races, you wash dishes,
you row your body through its failings,
you work the work of youth or of aging,
you put your shoulder to it.
Even in prayer’s stillness
you go the distance.
This is the holy pilgrimage:
to meet the given day.
You give yourself to this moment as it is,
hand to hand, all in,
and beyond all accomplishment
you are given the gift
of this life.
You come home with salt in your hair
and a whole wide sea in your heart.
__________________
Steve Garnaas-Holmes
Unfolding Light
Yesterday afternoon I watched Kate Hudson die in her movie,
A Bit of Heaven,
and I thought about how important our little bit of time is here on this earth.
The vast importance of now!
To never hold back sharing our love,
our bit of time here with the ones we love.
This morning, as I scrolled through my Facebook feed,
I read posts from various friends,
anniversaries of loss.
The shock of too young loss.
The bewilderment of unexpected loss.
The anger of longing for the love loss.
Missing persons.
Persons missing persons.
I listened to the music these friends shared.
Music chosen in a very personal, intimate way,
helping them deal,
bringing them comfort,
tapping into their passion,
their anger,
their extreme feelings,
their great oceans of emotion.
Music helping them allow,
helping them to move,
helping them release,
as they remain here, feeling left and bereft.
Music. Always music.
I cried with them,
for them,
for my own tsunami of losses.
As their music poured into me,
I felt their particular loss,
and I stood along side them and held them in love.
I honor the grieving hearts of the world.
I honor the gift, and power, of music.
🎼
Amy Lloyd (AL)
life: acoustic & amplified 