life: acoustic & amplified

to each his own  

 
18 years ago 

I stood at the edge 

of a great abyss 

in life 

a part of me, 

not known until that time, 

had awakened 

now I had a choice to make, 

to accept – 

or deny – 

this part of myself, 

which was revealed 

in such a wild, 

drastic, 

unexpected 

and overwhelming manner 

I knew this would be 

what, ultimately, 

saved, 

or 

destroyed, 

me. 

as I stood, 

still in innocence, 

not really knowing – 

yet, somehow, 

knowing in every way – 

the costs, 

the benefits, 

the responsibility, 

the awareness. 

the long dark road ahead, 

the excruciating valley years to come, 

the sharp, rugged climb up the mountain. 

18 years ago, 

I struggled 

with all of this 

as I stood on a balcony 

and made certain vows 

concerning the choices 

I would make through 

my time of learning: 
I would only follow love. 

No matter how I failed, 

I would remember it is not about how good I am.

 I would try, to the best of my ability, to live the words of Jesus in His Sermon on the Mount. 

I would never make a choice 

simply to benefit myself,

only to get money,

or to be comfortable. 

I would learn to be truthful and fair 

and be the person I wanted to be. 

I would be honest with myself – always – especially when I was wrong, or made a mistake –

yet, I would not live in fear or hate myself if I made mistakes,

I would stay aware and learn – 

so I would not make the same mistake twice. 

I would make the best choice I could at any given moment, 

and then move forward the best I could with no regret. 

I would do my best and give my best. 

I would look for good things every day. 
And with these parameters firmly in place, 

like Eve, 

I bit that apple 

and began… 

for good… 

for bad… 

to make my choices. 

from there I began to grow in wisdom, knowledge and self respect

from there I began the path to healing

from there I began to understand myself and realized each souls value, including my own

from there I have learned all I know about life and love

from there I began the long walk home

💞
AL

 

  
    

   
  I must lie down where all the ladders start,

In the foul rag-and-bone shop of the heart. 

      – Yeats